Understanding The Buyer Decision Process And Selling


First, let me say that I am no one special.  I just learned to surround myself with people smarter than me that understood the buyer decision process

In sales, or as I have been taught by my mentors, while helping people buy from you, all people think almost the same way, whether it is a large corporate officer or an individual buying from you and your business.  Notice I said, it is between two people.  It is.  That is the most important thing to remember.  People are buying from you.   If you really can not help them. Tell them.  Live your life with integrity.  You will not be able to help everyone.  You will run into or attract, depending upon your marketing and advertising chosen the wrong people, in too much trouble already, before you meet them, to help them.

You will be sorting out the people that say they want help to find the people that have the resources to afford the solution to their problems.  If they are to be your customers they will always have problems.  If they did not have problems, they would not need your products and services, Right?

While doing this you will discover the following:

1)  while helping people buy from you, all people think the same way,  whether it is a large corporate officer or an individual consumer you are talking to about buying whatever you are selling.  I am not saying all people think alike, but they all make buying decisions the same way.

2) Remember, You are helping them BUY from you.  I firmly believe you can not sell anything to anyone.  Selling has gotten a bad rap in the media and society because someone thought they could force someone to buy.  This is usually the sign of a bad sales person, orf at least they are very new at sales( think slimy sales person) You never want to be seen or thought of as that.  Remember, we are professionals, more like Doctors.  You are diagnosing the person’s situation and presenting them with a cure to it, if they do the work and do what you tell them.  Just as in medicine, a Doctor can not force a patient to live a healthy lifestyle.

Same thing for the solution you present to the person’s business problem/personal problems in business of life.   Remember you are always going to be working with a decision maker(s) that are people.  Learning how they function and think in a buying decision is essential for your business survival.  You survive and thrive, and make a profit when you understand and practice the art of helping people buy from you over and over again.


You can learn how to help them buy from You and not your competitors.

When it comes to making a decision to purchase, once you understand this process by the buyer sales will feel like breathing to you, the seller.  Sales will not longer seem slimy.  You are helping people solve real problems.  If you can’t tell people and move on to someone you can help.

  1. Understanding Apparent Reasons

    This will sound like one of the following when you hear it from a customer.  We never need to talk to prospects.  They just show up because of our system and buy at whatever level they feel appropriate for their situation.

    Your results will vary.  To see average earning examples go here: http://yourlastjobever.com/income/



    But, back to what I was saying.  When you have a customer that is serious about wanting success, they will sound like one of the following people in one of the following situations they can not solve on their own:

    1) A pain they are in that they want out of and now.
    2) A fear that they will soon be in pain
    3) A  Gain that they can not realize on their own(When I hear these situations is when I do my inside “happy dance” because these people usually do not have the time,  but have the money to afford the solution, and they are used to spending money to make at least 5 times more on average, than they spend)
    4) An impending event that they need to be prepared for so they are not in pain.


    The good thing for the seller  is that once you have one of the above 4 situations above, one of 3 things can happen:

    1) They make a decision to buy from you
    2) They make a decision not to buy from you
    3) They do nothing (the stall)

    Once one of the 4 apparent reasons above is discovered,  they are serious about doing one of those three options just above. If they do not have 0ne of those 4 apparent reasons there is no sales reason to talk to them.

    You may get people that are trying to get unpaid consulting from you.  In many cases online, providing value is a good way to form a trusting relationship with people, and they will eventually buy from you, but they may not.  They also need to know, like and trust you before they will consider trying something you have to sell.


    People that are new in business sometimes ask for unpaid consulting and do not know they look foolish when they do it.  But networking is always a good idea.  Always cut through the pretense and B$ “of seeing how we can help each other’s business” and find out how you can help them first.  Then, if you can, really try to introduce them to their ultimate customer.  Do it just because it is the right thing to do and for no other reason.  They may reciprocate, but do not expect it or do it for that reason.  Always give first. The Universe rewards you in ways I can not even describe they are so cool! (A post for another time)


    Next, in the buying decision process the buyer will gather information.

  2. Information Gathering By The Buyer About Your Company

    In this stage of the buying decision model, studied by the London School of Economics, people are doing their research. They are gathering information about you and your product or service.  It is always best that you be there with them( at least on the phone, text, facebook chat, or Google Hangout) while they are discovering information about their decision. You see many times they do not know what they do not know.  Or, you can have your competitor tell them about you.  The choice is yours as a business owner.

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  3. Divergent Thinking

    It is important that the buyer in a situation that is really important to them, look at alternatives to your product or service. Especially in this day and age. Information flows so freely that they have probably already done all this research already. Let them look at other companies and products and services,  it is all part of the buying process.

    Yes, you may lose the sale, but if you do,  it wasn’t yours to begin with. You see the compelling reason they have with you, does not outweigh the pain of change. Or, the logistics of the purchase did not work out.

    It is important for YOU, the person selling or marketing, to remember it is not about You during the sale,  but that it is all about the person that has decided to buy from you. That person, the decision maker has
    three personalities during the buying decision process:

    1) The Critical Parent( two adults agruing) or The Nurturing Parent( think of your Mother or Father when they are nice)
    2) The Adult – normal adult conversation
    3) The Rebellious Child(Brat) or Adaptive Child( Littel Angel)

    In a buying decision process, Adaptive Child asks the Nurturing Parent who asks the Adult if the thing they want to buy, will hurt them or not. The Adult says no it’s OK, to buy it and then the Adult works out the logistical details of buying whatever it is, if it’s OK, then the adult tells the Nurturing Parent it is OK to buy and the Nurturing Parent tells the Aadaptive Child it is OK to have it and then the Adult buys it and is happy until buyers remorse sets in.  This all happens every time you make a decision to make a major purchase.


    Now there are also transactions that are easily made.  They involve much less emotion and involve:

    1) Price

    2) Convenience

    3) Selection

    4) Location

    Are the criteria of the mostly,  the  Adult in these buying decisions.  Think what you do when you go to the Grocery Store.  But, here is a question for you?  How much is a bag of groceries?  Let me know in the comments down below.  When you get the answer you will have discovered a secret to making more money in your business.  Ask this question the next time someone asks you how much you charge.  What should be your answer?

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  4. Stop The Drive By Shooting

    One last thing happens in the buying decision process and this separates the good business owners from the great business owners.

    Remember you are in business to make a profit. You sell products or services or both at a profit. The buyer does not think the sale is complete until they get their problem of pain, fear or gain solved.

    Many times the person selling gets the money and runs. This is when the seller makes the biggest mistake. They get blind-sided by the drive-by shooting. Not, what you think. It has nothing to do with gang violence.

    This involves usually a loved one or advisor to the buyer, saying something like this, “What did you buy that for?”

    The best thing the seller can do for the buyer,  to avoid that embarrassing question,  is to rehearse the buyer with that question, and help them figure out the answer(s) by asking them questions to help the buyer figure out their situation.

    “What will you say when they say, “Why did you buy that?” This is when the compelling reason comes back out, as this was the real reason, not the apparent reasons first given for why they bought from you in the first place. The compelling reason is much more emotional. Many times an emotional response will be seen when they discover the real reason.  Many times they do not know. Your questions help them discover in a conversation, like you would if you were out with friends, and not an interogation, what is really important to the buyer.

    You will find a sert of questions to get you started in the 15K Formula and the Viral Blogging Academy.

    Two short stories to illustrate the points above.


    I was once in a meeting with the agency for a big fast food chain.  The VP said, in a real confident tone to start the meeting, “Tell you what you can do for me.”  A new sales person would start to throw-up all the features and benefits of their product or service.  I was not new.  I diverted the energy by that bold statement, with, “I don’t know, what did you think I would be able to do for you and your client?” Then, I shut up and let them tell me what was on their minds.  It was not about me.  it was all about them.  They told me exactly what they wanted.  I asked questions only. They answered them.  I never once made a statement.  I did not need to.  My questions helped them figure out what they wanted, as they did not know when we started.  Since I helped them figure it out, I gained authority in their mind.  They just bought from me.

    Then, I shut up and let them tell me what was on their minds.  It was not about me.  It was all about them.  They told me exactly what they wanted.  I asked questions only. They answered them.  I never once made a statement.  I did not need to.  My questions helped them figure out what they wanted, as they did not know when we started.  Since I helped them figure it out, I gained authority in their mind.  They just bought from me.  It was then that I started to really understand the buying decision process.  It had nothing to do with coffee is for closers mentality.  That is hard work and it sucks.  I’ve been on the phones dialing for dollars, it sucks.

    I have been in sales meetings where the decision maker will cry or get angry depending upon their personality type (another post for another time) when the compelling reason is discovered by the person buying.  get out of the way as people will throw money at you when you hit upon the real reason you are there.

    Many times they do not know what it is. We are just along for the ride as sellers. They will only buy when the compelling reason outweighs the pain of change.

    People hate change. They equate it with pain, fear of failure or embarrassment. So the compelling reason, the real reason they buy from you has to be greater than the pain of change.


    Compelling Reason To Buy From You > Pain of Change

    Remind them of that compelling reason you both discovered together in your conversation. This way when the drive-by comes in, and they will, you can have some answers prepared for the buyer to tell the spouse or advisor that will meet their needs too.

    It really is any wonder that people sell anything ever. But the great businesses do.  And, this can be You!


    This is what separates the good from the great sales people and marketers(network, affiliate and brick and mortar)  94% of all goods and services sold in Corporate America are sold by 4% of the sales people.

    This came from my mentors, Dan Kreutzer, and Robert Lambert, from The Samurai Business Group  and I worked on it for 7 years in the field, of sponsorship marketing, until I perfected, first my understanding of it, and second,  my use of it in the field to close a $15,000 and a $24,000 deal.  At the time that was huge!

    I was well on my way to my outcome of $20,000/month and $250,000/year in income, when the 2008 stock market crash hit. All corporate marketing budgets were frozen until right about now in 2015.

    I will not believe they are unfrozen until we are off quantitative easing.  Markets and marketing are all out of whack in Corporate America and the World for that matter.


    So my company  and I decided to learn Internet marketing skills to supplement what we already knew about sales and marketing. I was not ready for the awesome surprise I found!  But, that is a story for another time.


    Lesson 8 of The Top Producer Formula


    The whole buyer decision process was illustrated very well on stage at an Empower Network Event.  They made a product out of it.   A confident and humble David Wood talked to one of his team leaders and they role played in this scenario of buyer and seller.

    You will be blown away at the reaction of the pretend buyer( you can not fake what you will see.)

    Real emotion, that always happens when you hit a deep compelling reason.  This was demonstrated very well in the Top Producer Formula, lesson 8, on that stage.  I will not blow the surprise of what yoiu will see, but you will never forget how it helped you understand the buyer decision process.

    I signed contracts in my business,  in the tens of thousands of dollars,  for this information from my professional sales and marketing mentors, and you have a chance to get it for so much less. You have a huge opportunity in front of you right now if you are in a business struggling with making sales.  It dies not have to be that way for any business owner that uses this product when they gain access to this information.

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If this describes you. And you want to gain access to information that I have worked to learn during 7 years of my business life and you can get it by watching one lesson in the TOP Producer Formula, then click here, join as an affiliate and you will learn how you can get the Top Producer Formula in the Level-up Sequence inside Empower Network.
What should you buy? Everything, because each information product under promises and over delivers.. You deserve all the knowledge for your business that will make you more valuable to your business and the marketplace.
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8 thoughts on “Understanding The Buyer Decision Process And Selling”

  1. Great information Tom! Too many people don’t take the time to understand the psychology and dynamics of the sales process. I’ve also been learning some new thinking that focuses on your value set and how it relates to your Buyer’s values, to go with their situational awareness. Most importantly, Buyers will trust Sellers when they have detailed their story of pain and triumph relating to the products one sells. Have a great day!

  2. Hey Tom, great story about selling from your own experience….there is a part that is typed 2x. Is it on purpose. I come back to read your blog – it is a great reading…..thxs..m.

    • OOPs I will edit that thank You I missed that in editing. Found it! Yes, that was a duplicate, sometimes that has happened in Beta testing thatnk you for picking that up.

  3. Wow! Very in depth post, very precise and detailed. Anyone looking to learn the art of buying and selling better read this entire article through again and again. Thanks for sharing!


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